Getting Back Up

I have fallen to my knees
As I sing a lullaby of pain
I'm feeling broken in my melody
As I sing to help the tears go away

Then I remember the pledge you made to me

I know you're always there
To hear my every prayer inside
I'm clinging to the promise of a lifetime
I hear the words you say
To never walk away from me and leave behind
The promise of a lifetime

Will you help me, I'm falling apart
Pick me up, take me in your arms
Find my way back from the storm
And you show me how to grow
Through the change

I still remember the pledge you made to me

I am holding on to the hope I have inside
With you I will stay through every day
Putting my understanding aside

And I am comforted

—"Promise of a Lifetime" by Kutless

This song randomly came up on my iTunes just now ... I had pretty much forgotten about it but it's extremely calming.

Maybe I've been looking in the wrong place for comfort, not that I didn't already know that.

I actually am pretty much recovered from the betrayal of the last six months of my life. Don't get me wrong, I will always cherish it and if he ever decides he can handle friendship I'd be elated, but I'm confident in who I am and know there is so much more for me to look forward to. Honestly it's not even been on my mind much lately.

My stalker is currently not talking to me, which I find humorous. I mean if he wants to believe a drunk ex-coworker who he never talks to and is notorious for lying over sober me who he talks to all the time and has never lied to him ... it's really not worth the effort to even think about it. In fact, it kind of makes me laugh. Actually it makes me want to roll on the floor laughing. The word "holla" is not even in my vocabulary. If that doesn't make sense to you, feel free to ask me the story.

Spent last weekend in Minneapolis with some new friends in the business group I recently got started with. It was a lot of fun, not to mention refreshing, to hang out with people who are motivated about their future and believe there's something better out there. I'm content with where I am but I'm never content to stay there ... if that makes sense.

Headed up to Chitown this weekend to hang with a buddy of mine and meet some people he thinks I need to hang out with ... should be interesting. Also might be headed out to an upline's ginormous house with the friends from last weekend.

Lately my life has been consumed with web design whether it's at work or in my freetime.

I've been working with my buddy Drew to set up an awesome website for him. Tried super hard to get it done before he left but failed due to its extensiveness. It's going to be pretty sweet when it's done. I hate that he had to go, though. I don't handle goodbyes well, especially not with close friends. We pretty much told each other everything.

I totally got busted for having pics downloaded from his MySpace ... haha. I had done that a year ago when I had a huge crush on him apparently. I totally forgot about it and came across them accidentally when he was over late one night and we were trying to find the right picture for an article on the website.

Luckily he found it as amusing as I did. While I deleted those after finding them, I now have a ridiculous amount of much better pictures anyway that he downloaded from his photo shoot.

I would've flipped out a year ago which is humorous to think about now.

Oh, I moved. I'm in a house now.

My neighbors already probably think I'm psychotic since I always bounce up and down on my exercise ball when I use my computer ... my window faces the street and I have yet to get curtain rods ... so all they see is me bouncing up and down.

I excel at first impressions.

:)